I know it's dumb for me to be lonely right now. Really, I do. I fully understand the dumb-ness of that move. I have a boyfriend who loves me very much, and it makes no sense for me to be sad over not talking to him for four days.
But at the same time, I'm a teenage girl, and we get absurdly sad over that kind of thing. So yeah, it stings a bit.
23 January 2011
24 October 2010
This will do.
I'm sitting on my couch watching the women's gymnastics world championships, and listening to my mom speak with our houseguest. And I just came to the realization that I am really and truly happy. Right now, at least.
My stepdad isn't around. He's up north at a new job. So it's just my mom and me. I'm getting a sense of what it would have been like two years from now without her husband. I've developed very little emotionally in the last two years, but it's good now to get back to just being me and her.
School is going well, too. Suicide English (love that name) is actually kind of easy. And Accounting is getting less boring.
Aaaand. I just earned a 1 in my county solo/ensemble competition. I'm quite proud of this, as last time I did solo/ensemble I got a 3.
So yeah. I'm pretty good.
My stepdad isn't around. He's up north at a new job. So it's just my mom and me. I'm getting a sense of what it would have been like two years from now without her husband. I've developed very little emotionally in the last two years, but it's good now to get back to just being me and her.
School is going well, too. Suicide English (love that name) is actually kind of easy. And Accounting is getting less boring.
Aaaand. I just earned a 1 in my county solo/ensemble competition. I'm quite proud of this, as last time I did solo/ensemble I got a 3.
So yeah. I'm pretty good.
04 July 2010
Oh wow. It's been a while since I posted. Sorry about that.
Well, the "home" and "family" situation has deteriorated further. Notice the quotes. Basically, my mom has admitted that yes, her husband ignores me, and yes, he is a lying jerkface. Well, she didn't actually call him a jerkface (that was my addition) but he did lie about what he would try to do. Namely, being my father. He hasn't tried. Jerkface.
On a writing level, things are good but a little frustrating. I'm currently writing a chapter in my Marauder fic where the characters attend a friend's funeral. Surprisingly, the funeral scene was easy. It's the scene after that's being troublesome.
I've been thinking lately about the whole concept of an afterlife. I mean, there's life, and there's the afterlife, but is there an inbetween... like people in comas. What's their consciousness like? And can other people be invited into that consciousness, maybe in the form of dreams? Yeah.... I think I'll write a story about this.
Oh! I just discovered 30 Seconds to Mars. They're a band, in case you don't know. I've listened to their album A Beautiful Lie, and it really flows beautifully. Almost like a classical piece -- it has different sections that all make sense on their own, but it all ties together into one cohesive unit.
Well, overall thumbs-up on life. Still no boyfriend, but hey. The summer's still young.
This is Olivia, signing off. For now.
Well, the "home" and "family" situation has deteriorated further. Notice the quotes. Basically, my mom has admitted that yes, her husband ignores me, and yes, he is a lying jerkface. Well, she didn't actually call him a jerkface (that was my addition) but he did lie about what he would try to do. Namely, being my father. He hasn't tried. Jerkface.
On a writing level, things are good but a little frustrating. I'm currently writing a chapter in my Marauder fic where the characters attend a friend's funeral. Surprisingly, the funeral scene was easy. It's the scene after that's being troublesome.
I've been thinking lately about the whole concept of an afterlife. I mean, there's life, and there's the afterlife, but is there an inbetween... like people in comas. What's their consciousness like? And can other people be invited into that consciousness, maybe in the form of dreams? Yeah.... I think I'll write a story about this.
Oh! I just discovered 30 Seconds to Mars. They're a band, in case you don't know. I've listened to their album A Beautiful Lie, and it really flows beautifully. Almost like a classical piece -- it has different sections that all make sense on their own, but it all ties together into one cohesive unit.
Well, overall thumbs-up on life. Still no boyfriend, but hey. The summer's still young.
This is Olivia, signing off. For now.
12 April 2010
DoctorWhoDoctorWhoDoctorWho... ohmygosh!
And on a happier note that doesn't include panic attacks, I just watched the season 5 preview for Doctor Who on iTunes. I want it, and I am seeing if my TV has BBC America.
My Brain
I went to the doctor's today to investigate the random adrenaline surges I've been having recently. I mean dizziness, elevated heart rate, the whole enchilada. I thought it might have something to do with my English teacher running into me with her car last October, but no. Very different.
It turns out I'm having panic attacks caused by an adjustment reaction with anxious moods.
Wonder what caused that.
At least I don't have brain damage, because everyone knows that highly speculative surgery costs a lot more than a couch and an excessively certified set of ears.
It turns out I'm having panic attacks caused by an adjustment reaction with anxious moods.
Wonder what caused that.
At least I don't have brain damage, because everyone knows that highly speculative surgery costs a lot more than a couch and an excessively certified set of ears.
09 April 2010
AAAARRRGGH.
So... yeah. I have two weeks until prom and still no date. Plus next week is spring break, so no chance of securing there, as all the boys I'm likely to see over break are either dating someone else or completely horrendous. Completely horrendous meaning that they have possible abusive tendencies.
See? I'm a nice girl, I don't discriminate against boys who are nerdy or play music. In fact, I like musicians. And nerds. I like it when I can have a nice, intellectual conversation with a boy instead of just physical stuff.
So why the heck can't I get a date?!?!
See? I'm a nice girl, I don't discriminate against boys who are nerdy or play music. In fact, I like musicians. And nerds. I like it when I can have a nice, intellectual conversation with a boy instead of just physical stuff.
So why the heck can't I get a date?!?!
22 March 2010
Latest News on Boys
Well, the date I mentioned a few weeks ago fell through. I'm pretty sure the guy has a girlfriend too, at least if holding hands and kissing are any indication.
Here is where being a halfway normal teenage girl would definitely come in handy.
Here is where being a halfway normal teenage girl would definitely come in handy.
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